Happiness May Elude You But You Can Do Something About It

The Christmas holiday season will soon be upon us. It is a time when there is an increase in depression and even suicide rates. We are told that it is a festive season with enjoyment of happy times and Christmas cheer. It appears that for many, the reality is different. If people are alone or if this time of the year reminds them of their estrangement from family members, it is easy to see how depression can quickly follow.

Some people are naturally predisposed to happiness, while for others, it eludes them. Some scientists have argued that happiness is largely determined by genetics, health, and other factors mostly outside of our control. Medically, many assume that it is a chemical imbalance in the brain or the body, and therefore, the answer is to give drugs to alter the chemical imbalance.

People can indeed have chemical imbalances. Just look at the menstrual cycle. Hormonal changes can affect women emotionally at certain times of the month. If you consume alcohol, it affects you not only physically but mentally as well. Often, though, environmental factors and personal interactions can be important factors.

Research suggests that some people genetically have a "happiness gene." However, even if they don't have the "happiness gene," they can take charge of their joyfulness. At the same time, while the push to buy products is a priority at this time of year, it is also a fact that consumerism doesn't make us happy. It only serves to give us the temporary illusion of happiness.

We often think, "If I had this…, I would be happy." Our other self-talk is, "I just want to be happy." This is part of the illusion that we can get happiness from the outside. Have you noticed that if you bought a new car, you are enthused, happy, and on top of the world? A year later, that enthusiasm has waned. The car is just a car, and whatever fulfillment you were seeking before buying the vehicle is still there. You are still searching.

Similarly, a new relationship may make someone 'happy' during the initial passionate phase. Still, when that wanes, and people have to live together, reality sets in, and the state of mind can quickly change.

Psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky of the  University of California, Riverside, asked, "Is it possible to become happier?" Despite the finding that happiness is partially genetically determined and relates to one's health, it isn't easy to induce people to become happier. It requires a lot of change and motivation. We do have the power to make some specific changes. As with everything, starting is the most difficult thing. Then, it's implementing strategies.